Post by azurinevebbins on Dec 7, 2019 12:10:09 GMT -6
International Ninja Day Whilst Celebratin’ National Bad-tub Party Day
Our steam-powered stream session commences with “The Hardheaded Housewife” inside a modest, two-person bucket tub. It should also be noted that since the disappearance caused by Dolores, Azurine’s external occipital protuberance hasn’t been firing on all cylinders. Hence, why her frame of reference for “International Ninja Day” primarily revolves around the lore created by Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman, and Stan Sakai.
Azurine Vebbins: Appears I’m doin’ an awful job practicin’ da art of invisibility. Y’know wid today, Dursday, December 5 bein’ International Ninja Day and all. Par-en-det-i-cal-ly, it’s also National Bad-tub Day which is why I elected dis soo-din’ settin’. Deyr’s also da factoid of myself havin’ a very visible social media presence via Twitter, until recently. Felt like I was treadin’ water in an alternate time and/or dimension after Dolores snapped her pollex, index, and middle digit. Closest comparison would be when Leonardo first interacted wid Miyamoto Usagi a.k.a. Usagi Yojimbo. Felt foreign, which as a domesticated, submissive, and honest housewife, is some-din’ I didn’t expect to experience again.
Da emptiness of my internal monologue durin’ dat stretch could only be matched by whatever suit Tyler Ransom shabbily stitched to-ged-er. Speakin’ of my assigned dance partner for MHW DrowDown Episode Double X-Seven, Ransom comes across as a fabricated figment of folly. Den again, nearin’ Christmas, it probably should be “fa-la-la-la-la,” right? Right.
Vebbins emotes an elongated groan as she continues soaking inside the bathtub.
Azurine Vebbins: UGGGGGGGH! When dat bashee bleep stranded me in suspended animation and belief, she performed a vicious, vexin’ vivisection on my psyche. In similar fashion, Tyler tries cuttin’ contrarian commentary wid da dated accuracy of a Psych-branded Scyde. Dude would get a closer shave wid Occam’s Razor. Of course, given his flat top, I cannot imagine he’d be in da business of splittin’ hairs. Splittin’ a hare, maybe.
Now, my mental mappin’s re-co-ordinatin’ back to Usagi Yojimbo since Tyler comes across more like Jei, da Blade of da Gods. Still, no matter how clever or cunnin’ dat wolf believed himself to be, he couldn’t brin’ down Miyamoto. I hy-pod-e-size similar results when da self-professed “Real Deal” steps up to me.
Admittedly, Mr. Ransom’s train of tangentry rarely makes it to anoder station. After all, deyr’s a reason he’s called “Ran some” and not “Ran-sack.” Exertin’ exhaustive levels of effort’s just not his bag and well, when we’ve finished our performance inside da cajolin’ confines of da Cajundome...only din’ he’ll be holdin’ is his bag. Plus, at least Tyler doesn’t have a heavy burden like Fight Club’s Narrator had wid Durden. It’s goin’ to be a clean break as in what I’ll have to do once Ransom’s successfully scrambled towards a bottom rin’ rope. Of course, dat asserts he’ll possess da capability after receivin’ copious cases of carefully-crafted choreography from yours truly.. Won’t provide specifics since his debut requires da dignity of mystery. Just know dat I’ll be channelin’ Vanilla Ice from “Secret of Da Ooze” when I quote “rock and roll da place wid da power of da Ninja Turtles bass.” And yes, I did just air quote inside my bad-tub on account of citin’ a primary resource.
Speakin’ of citations and bein’ resourceful, dat’s some-din’ Tyler genuinely grapples wid as well. Accordin’ to his biography, he served an eighteen-mond sentence and is receivin’ his dird lease on life. Again, dough, he might no sell it bein’ attempt number dree. Whole scenario would be akin to how Wall Street handles cold mortgage stocks in a bubble burstin’ bear market. Of course, Ransom’s probably more fixated on da foamy, floatin’ spheres ‘round me dan my dulcet diatribe.
What does not heedin’ warnin’s from myself and da law have in common? Dey are direct violations. Probation was his second lease dat acted more as an unclipped leash. Blessed dat’s some-din’ I don’t deal wid when da missus takes me for long walks on da beach. Slight deviation but I can shift right back on track. It’s my intention for him to waltz da correct course similar to dat train of tangentry described earlier. Dat’s a well-weaved web even Peter Parker couldn’t dodger. Along wid Tyler Ransom, him, Spider-Man, and da baseball team are all Brooklyn-based, I believe, Probably prunin’ some-din’ fierce bein’ in dis bad-tub for so long...which isn’t some-din’ to fret my pretty little head ‘bout considerin’ my supportive spouse will remedy dat.
Vebbins vigorously scrubs herself with a loofah behind her back as she contemplates a compelling closing argument.
Azurine Vebbins: So, where does dis leave us besides, and I’m paraphrasin’ here, “Ol’ Ran-shed doin’ a swan dive wid a half-gainer right into da back of a garbage truck?” It leaves us wid da notion dat in dree days’ time...on Pretend to be a Time Traveller Day, December 8 streamin’ live on da SE Network...Tyler better score like it’s 1984 and sweep da leg like Johnny Lawrence should’ve done. If he doesn’t, den he’ll be da one wid his deal broken and wid-out kin’, country, or compensation.
The Camerasphere VRD streaming feed goes into a scrambled test pattern as Azurine methodically ascends to a vertical base.
A single camera, no cut shot of a large west coast mansion is revealed. The house on the outside is pristine, something almost out of a movie. The camera operator’s hand is revealed, pressing the door bell. The sound of the ring is faintly heard, but is clear that it has gone off in the house. Then, there is nothing. No response. No answer. The camera sits in silence for almost a minute which is truly almost an eternity in live air time.
Then, off screen, a voice is heard, presumably that of a crew member.
Unknown voice: Hey. Um, yeah. He’s not here. (pause) No. Seriously. (pause) Well, I suppose, yes, he could be here. Somewhere. But currently, it’s been about twenty, thirty minutes and we’ve tried the door, banging on windows, calling him. Nothing. (pause) Yes, yes we got some b-roll footage of the house. We’ve done all we can do, and we’ve got a deadline too, you know? We’ve got places to be. I’ve got my kids Christmas program here in a few hours. We’re going to have to leave. (pause) Seriously? (pause) Um. Are you sure that’s alright? (pause) Um. Okay.
Dale. Hey, boss says to check the door. See if it’s unlocked or something? Said that we can cover our asses and say its like a welfare check.
At this moment, another voice, louder is heard. This one is clearly one of the man operating the camera. Simple deductive reasoning means that this man’s name is Dale.
Dale: Well, alright.
A simple reach to the door is seen on camera. Shockingly, the door handle turns, the door cracks open.
Dale: Well I’ll be…this son-of-a-gun is unlocked.
Unknown voice: Boss, did you hear that? It’s unlocked. (A longer pause) Um. Okay. Um. Yeah, sure. (pause) Okay. Will do. But I’m just sayin’…(pause) Yes ,I understand. But seriously, if I get arrested and miss my kids program….(pause) yes sir. Okay, okay fine. (pause) Okay. Yes. Um. Yes, we will. We will. (pause) Okay. Okay bye.
Hey Dale, boss said we need to go in. We need to see if he’s here. If he’s here, we’ve got to try to get something. Boss said it’s money just burning right now and we’ve got to try to get something usable.
But look, man, we’ve got to make this quick. I’ve got to be out of here in the next hour. If I miss another concert, the wife is not going to be happy.
The camera finally turns towards the unknown voice and nods in agreement. The unknown voice is now revealed to be a crew member holding a boom mic. He is a bit disheveled and clearly frustrated by the appearance on his face.
Dale: Well, look. Money doesn’t make itself, and I really can’t afford to be searching for another job. So let’s just get this son-of-a-gun done and over with, shall we?
The camera shows the crew member begrudgingly agree before turning back to the door and slowly opening up. The camera scans around the downstairs area of the house and the appearance of it can only be described in two words.
Crew Member: Holy shit.
The place is nothing if not a disaster. Clothes, bottles of alcohol, food are everywhere. It’s almost hard to see the ground. It looks as if the place had not been cleaned in months or if a party had occurred in the previous days. We see, via the camera, the men step over the trash and look around, from the living room they travel to the kitchen, and then around to another area which could be described as an entertainment room. Large TV’s, a pool table, and something that appears to be a dance floor. This area, though, is still as in much of ruins as the rest of the house.
One could almost describe this as symbolism. A shiny, beautiful exterior, and an inside that is torn to shreds. An inside that is broken, and appears almost unfixable.
This has been the reality of Tyler Ransom for a very long time. The rumors were true. A party boy with an inability to control himself. A warrior in the ring, a former champion, but one with demons that control him in ways that have led to his ultimate demise and fall from grace.
He had promised those at Mile High that he was going to turn a corner, to be the best version of himself. Yet this image painted a whole different picture entirely.
The camera begins it’s scan of the areas in the house and moving through the rooms before heading to a set of stairs. At this moment, the camera stops and we hear the crew member once more.
Crew member: Dale. Dale, you hear that?
Dale: I do, I do. It sounds like…
Crew member: An alarm. Like one of those iPhone alarms.
Dale: I think that son-of-a-gun is coming from upstairs.
Crew member: Well, go up there, go on. We’ve gotta check it out.
There is no more speaking at this point and instead we see the camera heading up the stairs. About half way up the stairs the camera microphone is able to pick up the sound that the men have heard. It is, indeed, a phone alarm. As the camera moves down the hall, the sound becomes louder….and louder….and louder until it turns and reveals a master bedroom. This room, like the rest of the house, is an utter disaster. However….
Crew member: Holy shit.
The camera reveals a man face down in the master bed, wearing nothing but briefs. Even though the face is not seen, it seems clear that this is the physique of Tyler Ransom. The camera then quickly turns and shows the crew member with his mouth agape.
Dale: What do we do?
There is a long pause as we see the wheels in this man’s brain turning. He paces for a moment before stopping and looking back to Dale.
Crew member: Shake him.
Dale: Say what now?
Crew member: Shake the damn guy. We’ve got to, ya know. See if he’s dead or something.
Dale: I can’t…son-of-a-gun…I can’t shake him.
Crew member: Why not?
Dale: Because. I’ve got the camera.
Crew member: I don’t care! Shake him.
Dale: You shake him.
Crew member: You shake him!
In the middle of this argument, which is of the same ilk as a long-time married couple, we hear, off camera, the moans of another voice, coming from, what appears to be, the bed. The camera quickly turns back to the bed to see the man, now definitely Tyler Ransom, stirring from his bed.
Tyler Ransom: Shut the (expletive) up! Both of you! And for the love of God, turn that damn alarm off.
Tyler Ransom is seen clutching his head, stirring from his slumber. His body slowly moves as one does when rising from a long nights sleep. As the camera stays fixated on Tyler Ransom, we see the crew member rushing over to the phone on the other side of the bed and turning off the alarm. The camera is now on the right corner of the foot of the bed, while the unnamed crew member is on the left side of the foot of the bed. The camera, once again stays fixated on Tyler.
As he rolls around on the bed for a moment, coming to his senses, we then see that exact moment where his brain ticks on to the point where he realizes that two complete strangers are lurking over him, one with a camera.
In this exact moment we see Tyler’s eyes widen to the point where his eyeballs reveal his large bloodshot baby blues. As soon as this happen, his body movies with cat-like reflexes to grab a sheet from his bed to cover his body and he stands up, on the top of his bed, his mouth clenched.
Tyler Ransom: Who are you!? Who are you!? What the (expletive) are you doing in my house? Get out of my house! Get the (expletive) out! You’re both (expletive)!
Crew member: Mr. Ransom! Mr. Ransom! (His hands moving in a defensive position) We mean no harm, no harm at all! We are here for an interview, a scheduled interview. We talked on the phone last week.
As Tyler’s body stays in attack mode for a moment, we begin to see everything clicking in his brain. This realization is becoming clear through his facial expressions and by showing how is body relaxes a bit.
Tyler Ransom: Oh, shit. And you assholes didn’t think to knock?
Crew member: Mr. Ransom, we did. We’ve been here for a half an hour.
Tyler stares at him for another second before sitting at the edge of the bed, his hand moving to his temples, massaging them.
Tyler Ransom: (Looking up to the crew member) Well, damn. Guess I hit it a little too hard last night, didn’t I?
Crew member: Look. Mr. Ransom, we are just here to do our job, to get some thoughts on your debut. We were brought here to put together an introduction package for you and to get your thoughts on your debut match against Azurine Vebbins. That’s why we’re are here. Trust us, we don’t want to be here as much as you don’t want us here.
Tyler Ransom: Who sent you here?
Crew member: Mile High executives. (He reaches in his pocket and pulls out a card and hands it to him.) See? Here are my credentials.
Tyler Ransom: Well (expletive).
Dale: Mr. Ransom, if you could refrain from that kind of language though, it makes it really hard for editing purposes. Really.
We then, again, see Tyler flip a switch to anger and turn to the camera, starring at the man behind the camera with intense aggression before standing up on the carpet at the foot of his bed.
Tyler Ransom: And you are, you stupid mother (expletive)?
Dale: I…I’m Dale.
Tyler Ransom: Well, Dale, let me give you a little bit of advice here, my friend. If you tell me what to do one more time, it’ll be the last time you ever speak, you understand me? I don’t care if I’m still drunk or not, it will be nothing but pain for you, okay?
Dale: Sir. Sir, I’m sorry. It’s just. Look, we can’t be here long and we just needed some footage, and your match against Ms. Vebbins.
He pauses before sitting back on the bed, clenching his temples again and looking back him to him.
Tyler Ransom: You mean the woman with the speech impediment? Sounds like she’s dumb or something?
Dale: Well, sir, I wouldn’t say that…
Putting his hand up as if to shush him, he shakes his head.
Tyler Ransom: You wouldn’t? You wouldn’t do that? You wouldn’t say she sounds like an absolute disaster and looks even more like one? Well, don’t worry about that, camera man, because those are my words. That’s what I’m saying…and that’s an absolute fact. You ever hear that clown try to form sentences? It’s like she’s got a mouth full of marbles. I mean, for Christ Sake, she’s got that Bobby Boucher shit going on like she’s trying to be the star in the sequel of the Waterboy.
The other crew member, who is still in the frame, is seen laughing a bit at this undercut jab. Tyler’s head turns to him.
Tyler Ransom: Oh? You think that’s funny do you? You think I’m entertaining now? You think what I have to say has value now, huh? Well, maybe you’ll think about that the next time you decide to break into my house and try to get footage for me for a dumb-ass promo. Okay? Jesus Christ!
Tyler then stands up and stumbles over to a stand near a television and grabs a bottle of water that is on the stand, he slowly opens it up and takes a swig.
Tyler Ransom: Look. Guys. Look. I’m sorry, really I am.
He appears sincere in this moment.
Tyler Ransom: I get that you’re trying to do your job, and you’re going to try to get it done by any means necessary. I understand. In fact, part of me really sorts of respect that you guys both have the nut sacks to break into my house and try to get information from me. But here’s the deal, I’m not in the mood to talk right now, you understand? I had a long night, I had a good time, and now, here I am, waking up with two hairy ass strangers in my room who are acting me to juggle for them like I’m a clown. If you want footage from me, if you want something that shows who I am then why don’t you just go get some old footage of me from a decade ago. I’m sure I said some really cool things back then that you can put to use, okay? Just go and do that and those clowns at Mile High will never know the wiser.
Crew member: But Tyler, Mr. Ransom, don’t you think it needs to be a bit more personalized? I mean, you’re back after a five year hiatus. After five years you’re clean and sober….
He looks around and sees the mess, many of the bottles that are around are alcoholic.
Crew member: Allegedly. People were excited to see you back and healthy, they just wanted to know what your game plan was and what your goal was for Mile High…
Tyler’s hands go up again, dismissively.
Tyler Ransom: Look boys. You want to know what my game plan is? You want to know what I’m going to do here at Mile High? You want to know how I feel now that I’m sober? If that’s what you want to know, then why don’t you ask me when I’m sober, okay? Jesus Christ.
The fact of the matter is, I’m back because I miss the thrill of going out there and laying asses on the mat. I’m back because the paychecks that come to me for doing it make me living the lifestyle that I like living worth it. I’m back because I can be. Isn’t that enough? Just get the (expletive) out of here, now, before I call the cops and we do this proper next week for my next match okay? But, for Christ’s sake, get out of here now, and don’t ever walk into my house again, you understand me?
The camera pans over to the crew member and we see him nod and gesture to the camera to exit. The camera begins to oblige before stopping and turning, one last time, to Tyler.
Dale: Mr. Ransom. Sir. Can you just….maybe, give a message to Ms. Vebbins for your match here in the coming days?
We see Tyler sigh and flop back on his bed, starring at the ceiling. He gestures to the ceiling as if he’s talking to himself and then, eventually, becomes a bit vocal.
Tyler Ransom: You want to know if I have a message for Azurine Vebbins? You want to know if I need to threaten her to scare her for our match? Jesus Christ, man, You don’t understand do you?
The fact of the matter is, I haven’t thought more than 5 minutes about that woman and her mouth. Have I trained for her? No. Have I made a gameplan? No. And why is that, do you think? Well, That’s because I’m the best thing this company has ever seen and I don’t need to train for something that is an automatic. Do I have to train to breathe? Do I have to train to take a shit? Do I have to train to shave? No. No I don’t. That’s because it just happens. And when it comes to Tyler Ransom, that’s how this sort of stuff goes. When it comes to victories, it. Just. Happens. It’s what I do.
You see, boys, when it comes to Azurine Vebbins, she’s more worried about whether or not it’s ‘wear a green sweater’ day or ‘National Four Loko appreciation’ day than she is about battling someone who is a supreme talent in this industry. She will not know what hits here when she gets in the ring with me. No one ever does. I don’t care if it’s been five years off or fifty years off, when it comes to Tyler Ransom, the world isn’t ready. They’ve never been ready, and they never will be. I am THE absolute greatest gift this place has ever seen, and when I get into the ring after this five year hiatus, the world will remember that Tyler Ransom is the greatest thing this world has ever seen. And frankly, boys… (He pauses for a moment before delivering his money-line catch phrase) That’s ALL I’ve got to say about that.
See you soon, Azurine.
He shakes his head as he rubs his temples again.
And I’ll see you both when I’m sober. Now get the (expletive) out of my house. Now.
Once again, the crew member gestures to the camera to leave, and this time, they both do. The camera goes down the step and quickly hits the door to the outside. After the door opens it hurries outside before turning to the other crew member.
Crew member: Well, that’s something. We at least got something. (pause) Right?
There is another long pause before we hear the voice of Dale.
The camera clicks off.
Admin: Note that the deadlines have changed. I made the change for the convenience of the other judges.
May 17, 2021 15:21:30 GMT -6
Admin: Hope everyone is enjoying their 4th of July weekend/week/day! 💪💯💯
Jul 4, 2021 14:22:58 GMT -6
Admin: Where do yall hist photos? I'm thinking about switching sites, because I'm paying a monthly subscription for Photobucket and they got watermarks back on my images. I'm guessing it's a glitch or something, but it's already been two days.
Aug 7, 2021 6:56:18 GMT -6
The Purge: I use Imgur - and I've never paid a cent for their services, and no water marks
Aug 7, 2021 8:48:13 GMT -6
Deleted: o.o Lord, Rob! Get away from Photobucket ASAP! I’m with Haircin — use Imgur. It’s way better and costs nothing.
Aug 8, 2021 16:28:35 GMT -6
Admin: I appreciate yall! ✊💯💯 Ima look into it this week. Apologies to everyone if some of the images for the show tonight have that Photobucket watermark. I didn't have the time today obviously to make any switches. But I will make time this week. 💯💯
Aug 8, 2021 17:43:04 GMT -6
Admin: Katrina will probably be happy too as she was just telling me I was crazy for paying monthly for a photo host. Lol.
Aug 8, 2021 17:44:00 GMT -6
Admin: ***NOTE*** I moved the deadline up 12 hours to give the judges an extra day to read over the rps.
Aug 10, 2021 15:29:37 GMT -6
Admin: Started messing with Imgur today and confirmed to myself that Imgur was the original photo host I was using for Season One and the beginning of Season Two of MHW. Something made me mad and thats when I switched to Photobucket. I don't remember what though.
Aug 12, 2021 16:08:47 GMT -6
Admin: Ima still switch back to it though, because the Photobucker watermarks are still showing up on some images.
Aug 12, 2021 16:09:19 GMT -6
Admin: ***Just A Reminder*** The new deadline is less than 24 hours away. 💪💯💯
Aug 20, 2021 9:45:58 GMT -6
cmosh: Marisol Vilaró is Spanish, she is from Spain
Sept 14, 2021 22:50:17 GMT -6
Admin: Noted 💪💯💯 So I can get Rrina to teach me how to pronounce her name.
Sept 15, 2021 15:35:32 GMT -6
cmosh: Don't worry I don't know how to pronounce it either. She is actually played by someone else, so it is sometimes hard to do RP's with them due to our work schelduce but I am alound to use the character over here
Sept 15, 2021 19:28:12 GMT -6
Admin: Trying something different with the match writing, based off of research and just to try something new. It's a hit or miss concept, so feedback would be appreciated. ThrowDown will also debut the new layout concept. AMMO will start with that new layout...
Sept 18, 2021 8:35:55 GMT -6
Admin: ...on the following AMMO. This AMMO will just have the new match writing idea.
Sept 18, 2021 8:36:32 GMT -6
cmosh: I want to apologize to everyone for not doing a rp this week. Just been a tough week at work and other things got in the way as well, again I'm really sorry for not rping this week
Sept 18, 2021 21:07:43 GMT -6
Admin: It happens, brudda!
Sept 19, 2021 19:49:09 GMT -6