MHW Ultimate Championship Match

”The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting.”
-Sun Tuzla, The Art of War


“Unless we’re talking about Eavan Maloney. I’m going to destroy that bitch.”
-Leah Aguero



The scene opens up just outside of the Aguero residence. The War Queen Leah Aguero exits a red Tesla Model S and begins making her way up the front walk towards the house. The camera closes in tight and follows just over her shoulder as she approaches and steps through the front door. The Aguero house is more alive than it has been in awhile. The whole family is under one roof. Leah looks around, taking in the sights and sounds for a moment before making her way down the hall towards the kitchen. As she enters, Leah can hear her protege, Layla Diaz, talking.

Layla Diaz: I tellin’ yous, girl. Splat done finally got sum one dat can actually act on one dem shows. Tell me yous saw dat sneak ah Madison Tower. Dat ish wuz on point an why? Cuz I’ma up in dat bish. Fa realz. I’ma make dat show send da ratins tru da roof.

A smirk comes across The War Queen’s face as she sees Diaz gloating about her role as a dead girl in the upcoming Splat series, Madison Tower. All the more amusing is that Diaz is gloating about it to Leah’s sister, Q, who looks none too entertained as she stands cross-armed, staring out into nothing. Leah and Q lock eyes for only a moment as Q rolls her eyes at her sister. Leah passes through the kitchen but she can still hear Diaz in the background.

Layla Diaz: Yous wuz in a Splat show too, right? One a dem DC shows a sumtin? Mus not a been too memorable. I know mah gurl, Leah, was dat ice queen chick in a series too but she ain’t inta all dat actin’ stuff. Now, me? I guess I’ma jus a natural. Da only ting I didn’t care fah wuz da fact I needed ta keep dyin’ mah hair. Do yous know how many red Kool-Aid packets it takes ta get it dis red again?

The sound of Diaz’s arrogance slowly fades out as Leah opens the door to her basement and begins to descend down the steps. The sound of weights clanking together gets louder and louder as The War Queen reaches the bottom step and sees Jed Coffey spotting her husband, Jay Aguero, as he benches the barbell.

Jed Coffey: Noice. You go this, Bro. You’re getting swole. You’re no boosh. Smash dem gorillas. You know what to do with those weights. Schmucks up, schmucks down. All the way, Bro. Don’t worry. Mighty J’s got you.

Jay resets the bar and sits up on the bench. Jed steps away to another area of the room. As Leah makes her way over to her husband, Jay reaches for his ears and takes his PowerBeats headphones out. Leah bends over slightly to give Jay a kiss on the forehead.

Jay Aguero: Where’d you find this guy? He won’t shut up. I’ve got headphones in. They aren’t even on. I just want him to get the hint that I don’t need him talking to me. Noise cancelling my ass. Sounds even worse muffled. And what the hell is a boosh?

Leah doesn’t even respond. She runs her fingers through Jay’s short cut hair and then down to his chin. She shoots him a smile before leaving the gym and into her “office”. As she enters the room, her throne is already set for her. Jed Coffey, having fetched her necklace of mementos she has collected over the course of the last few weeks, is already waiting for her. The War Queen approaches the throne and takes a seat. Lifting her hair up, Jed places the necklace around her neck and clasps it together. Leah drops her hair and leans back into the throne, staring directly into the camera as she runs her fingers through her latest addition; a piece of Eavan Maloney’s hair. Jed Coffey returns with a podium that has the MHW Ultimate Title encased in glass, set atop it. He then disappears out of the shot.

Leah Aguero: Always remember, there are few things in life that are inevitable but one of them is that I will get what I want by any means necessary.

The War Queen continues to twirl her index finger around the bleach blonde tuft of hair.

Leah Aguero: There’s no one safe when it comes to paying the piper and Eavan Maloney learned that first hand two weeks ago at ThrowDown. I came to collect my prize and, well, I got what I wanted. I warned you, Maloney. I warned all of Mile High Wrestling that my kingdom was growing. This was only the beginning. We shall continue to rise and more shall join the ranks. Now, I’m no vindictive dictator that will force any of you to join unwillingly. No, instead, I am a reasonable woman. You either accept your fate in life and bow before your Queen or the body count will continue to rise. You’re either with me or against me. The choice is in your hands.

Leah leans back on her throne, crossing her legs in front of her.

Leah Aguero: Wendy knew this. She knew this for a long time now. The choice was hers. Unfortunately, she made her choice several weeks back when she decided to get involved in our matters. You see, I was out there amongst the masses setting forth my declaration of the era of the War Queen Empire. There I was, minding my own business, when the Purge decided they would do the bidding of a false prophet. Instead of falling in line, they opted to enable the fractured state of Eavan Maloney’s ego. They provided a distraction so that the false prophet could attempt to take out the Queen. I could not stand for this.

The War Queen uncrosses her legs and leans forward, resting her elbows on her knees and clasping her hands together as she stares into the camera.

Leah Aguero: An example had to be made. Contrary to what the Shieldmaiden narrative would like you to believe, The War Queen handles her affairs in a just and righteous fashion. I do not require others to aid me in my ascension to the top. I’ve already arrived on my mountain top all on my own accord. It is the Shieldmaiden mentality that thinks there is strength in numbers but it isn’t the quantity that brings you to the pinnacle but the quality. Two weeks ago, at ThrowDown, I made an example of Wendy Pelligrini. She was paying for her own actions, not those of the false prophet. Wendy acted out of her own transgressions and the results were catastrophic unto herself. Miss Pelligrini will never be the same after our encounter.

Leaning back again, Leah crosses her right foot over her left knee and dusts off her boot.

Leah Aguero: Wendy Pelligrini should consider herself lucky that I only gave her a cracked orbital bone. She is already aiming for a return to the ring in four to six weeks time, further proving what a fool she is. That time period heals the damage done for everyday use; not for combat sports. She will still be weak upon her return. She will still have a target. She will still be damaged goods. Thankfully, I don’t need to wait six weeks to attain my prize from her. This one, actually, means quite a bit to me.

The War Queen snaps her fingers and Jed Coffey reappears. He hands her a vial and waves to the camera before stepping away. Leah holds the vial up in the air, eyeballing it.

Leah Aguero: After ThrowDown, I knew Wendy would become untouchable. I do my work within the confines of the squared circle and I was far too anxious to collect my prize by waiting four to six weeks. So Jed took my boot and noticed when I cracked Wendy with The Endgame, there was a bit of blood residue left behind.

A smile comes across the face of The War Queen as she shakes the vial of Wendy’s blood in front of the camera. She then reaches down to her necklace and attaches the vial to her collection of mementos.

Leah Aguero: Another one bites the dust. Eavan Maloney, further fueling her own self absorbed ego, threw a party in “Wendy’s honor”. Let’s be realistic for a moment. This whole charade was nothing more than a means to put herself at the forefront of everyone’s attention. She wanted to attack me. She went so far as to bring up Wendy Pelligrini’s family; including her own son. What sort of heinous person would further torture a child in efforts to get those around them to despite their queen. A desperate person that is.

A sinister glare casts across Leah’s face as a grin stretches from ear to ear.

Leah Aguero: When Wendy’s son looks up at his mother, he will forever be reminded of the actions that took place this past ThrowDown. It will serve as a constant reminder that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Young J will look up at his mother asking, “Mommy, what sort of monster did that to your face?” Well, I am the one that carries that answer for her child. I’m the monster, J. I’m the monster that permanently disfigured your mother’s face. Let that be a lesson to you. Your mother was not a good woman. She may have been a good mother to you but when she stepped out that door every other week she showed her true colors as a human and she suffered the consequences of her actions. The same will be said as to another individual you know so dearly; Eavan Maloney.

Leaning back in the throne once again, Leah crosses her fingers together in front of her as her elbows rest on either arm of the throne.

Leah Aguero: You certainly are something aren’t you, Eavan? A wrestler. A podcaster. A model. A record executive? Delusional. Neurotic. Pretentious. Senile. Unrealistic. Hot-headed. Manipulative. And yet in some circles I’m considered the sociopath? When Mile High Wrestling’s doors reopened you were pegged to be the face of the company. The hottest prospect to join the organization. Don’t fool yourself with some silly little survey filled out by a bunch of pissant little fans that like to hop aboard the Azurine Vebbins Express. You were the one that was marked for the posters. Everywhere I looked, marketing material boasted Eavan “Krigare” Maloney main eventing the return of Mile High Wrestling. Then, the day came and you suffered defeat. Fast forward two weeks later and you’re calling out Skrabal Stanzas. Your delusional mind forced you in an attempt to save face to call out the most dominating MHW Ultimate Champion in Mile High history not known as The War Queen Leah Aguero and, again, you suffer a humiliating defeat. Two weeks later you FINALLY get your first win in MHW… by throwing someone over the top rope.

The War Queen shakes her head back and forth in disappointment.

Leah Aguero: That senile brain of yours begins to inflate your ego once more because somehow you’ve become the number one contender to the MHW Ultimate Title; MY title. Two weeks after that you team with your compadre, Alejandra Carbajal, to take on Skrabz and myself. Again, you suffer defeat at my hands. When does it get to be too much, Eavan? When do the delusions of grandeur stop. Clearly, things began to change. You started becoming unglued. You had already announced to the world that you would retire from wrestling later this year should you not be a champion or be in contention for a title. If that wasn’t a spoiled brat tantrum as it was, that brain of yours, having already suffered defeat after defeat said ‘fuck it’. If you couldn’t beat me at Mile High Spectacular III then what’s the point of sticking around. If you couldn’t beat me, Mile High Spectacular III would be your last match.

Again, Leah shakes her head in disappointment.

Leah Aguero: You were spiraling. You were hot-headed. You demeaned the fans that came out and cheered you at each and every ThrowDown no matter how many times you lost. I know a strong will when I see it and, Eavan, you don’t have it. You are weak willed and you don’t belong in the main event of Mile High Spectacular III. Up until last week your only win in the entire history of MHW was a battle royal. Your other win was against a fucking junkie that’s being terrorized by The Geist.

The War Queen pauses to give Eavan Maloney a golf clap.

Leah Aguero: So what now, Eavan? That Shieldmaiden hype gets in your brain and you think you can change things? You think all of a sudden, after already suffering defeat at my hands on two separate occasions, you’re going to all of a sudden have the fortitude to match me? Or was it because I broke your little friend’s face? This won’t just be Mile High Spectacular III just because it’s the third installment. It’s also going to be the third time my hand is raised against you.

The War Queen once again leans forward and points directly at the camera.

Leah Aguero: You’re trying to put up a big game but I see right through you, Eavan. You’re scared. You’re desperate. You think you may have just made the biggest mistake of your life saying that you would retire early should you not defeat me. The truth is, you’re right. This is single handedly the biggest mistake you have ever made. You think watching some footage from NFW teaches you about me? You think reviewing content from OATH gets you any closer to knowing my inner workings? Fuck, Eavan. You’re even dumber than I thought you were. What about my time in Elysium? What about my time in that rink a dink strip mall federation? Your girl Carter could tell you more about that place. What about the UWF where I got my start? The reality is, it doesn’t matter what footage you watch. Your neurotic brain is just going to attempt to spin the situation in your favor. I’ve never hidden behind the fact that I have used people to get my opportunities. Once in that ring, however, my work does the talking. Your Shieldmaiden sisters will tell you that Jansen Myrrh and Gabriel Ohio headed Coven but the facts are the facts. Jansen and I spearheaded the idea for Coven together. Your Shieldmaiden sisters will tell you that I brought the Second City Riot Squad into NFW to get somewhere. Bitch, I am the SCRS. The truth is Lara Bratton brought me in to make an impact and that’s exactly what we did. SCRS was undefeated for almost a year in tag team competition. Your Shieldmaiden sisters will tell you that my cuz, Stephanie Matsuda, carried The Inevitable in OATH. The truth is blood ran that team. Steph and I ran that tag team division TOGETHER until I was ready to move on to bigger and brighter things. You know not what you speak of and you fall into the same twisted mindset many of your Shieldmaiden sisters do. You attempt to write your own narrative but the reality is a much different situation. Just because you put it in a podcast doesn’t make it real. What’s next? You going to post it on Facebook, then all 9,623 Shieldmaidens will share it and make it facts? There is really but one truth in this entire situation and it’s this. You can watch all the footage of me in the world. It’s not going to help you. Since day one I have spoken one phrase that echoes my sentiment to this day. You stay complacent, you’ll get nowhere. Watch all the footage you want, I’m already ten steps ahead of you.

The War Queen leans back in the throne and throws her feet up over one of the arm rests.

Leah Aguero: You’re done after Mile High Spectacular III you little shit. Maybe if your fingers weren’t in thirty different pies at the same time you could actually focus on the sport you’re about to walk away from. This is the era of the War Queen. My Empire will know no bounds. Meanwhile, your supposed Warrior mentality will leave you walking out of the arena as the ending to the Hulk tv series plays in the background. Pathetic. You call yourself a warrior. Shouldn’t put it past the lot of you to try to come across tough. Did you pick your own Shieldmaiden name or did someone else name you. Krigare. Is that what you are or what you wish you were? They’re all the same. Bullet. Zombie. Psycho. Killer. Bruiser. Okay, maybe I’ll give Bruiser a little credit. Bex at least lives up to her name a bit. You’re no warrior, Eavan. This is a war that has already been won. You see, the victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win. Which one of those warriors do you think you are? I’d say you’re the latter.

Leah stands up from her throne and places a hand on the glass enclosure the MHW Ultimate Title sits in.

Leah Aguero: You have yet to show that Ultimate Warrior mentality, Eavan. I hope you bring some of that supposed hurt to Mile High Spectacular III because I long to feel something. Anything. I want the pain. It only entices me. Just ask Sosh. She’s inflicted pain upon me before and felt the retaliation. I would say to just take the night off and kneel before me in that ring as you kiss my boot but you’re too stubborn and hard headed. I’m going to have a great deal of fun this Sunday. Don’t worry. It won’t be quick and painless. It will be slow. It will be torturous. You will learn that you should have retired from pro wrestling before this match even occurs. You could have gone out on top beating that junkie, Tyke Index. Instead, you will be another body piled up at my feet. I’m the one that’s willing to get the win BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY, Eavan. It’s not just some play on words. This Sunday at Mile High Spectacular III you will lose. You will retire. You will kiss my boot and I, your Queen, will stand victorious STILL your MHW Ultimate Champion. No one has been able to defeat me since Mile High Wrestling since its return. What makes you think you can do it now, with everything on the line? Kneel Before Me, for I am your Queen, The War Queen Leah Aguero.

Slowly, the rest of The War Queen’s Empire circles around in the background. Jed Coffey, Layla Diaz, Ya Girl Q and Jay Aguero. Leah looks around at her family and then back at the camera.

Leah Aguero: You are dismissed.

The War Queen snaps her fingers and the footage cuts to black.