The scene opens up inside the Aguero household in the southside of Chicago, IL. Jed Coffey is downstairs in the gym running on a treadmill, looking at himself in a wall full of mirrors. Layla Diaz walks in on him talking to himself.
Jed Coffey: Fast as fuck, boi. Fast as fuck. You’re looking svelt, my boosh.
Layla Diaz: Yo, who da fucks yous even talkin ta?
Jed Coffey: Um, myself. I’m looking in the mirror. Look at the way the lighting in here accentuates my tris. And how about my delts?
Jed continues to pose in front of the wall of mirrors.
Layla Diaz: Dat really wut yous concerned bout right naw? How’s bout yous gets yous head inta da game. We gots our first match in Mile High dis weekend.
Jed Coffey: How could you ever take your eyes off this sexy slab of meat, Diaz? I’m getting ripped tonight, R.I.P…
Layla Diaz: Yous continue wit dat, yous sleepin on da couch tanite. Fa realz.
Coffey finally stops his posing and turns his attention over to Diaz. As they do, they both turn towards the camera.
Layla Diaz: MHW, yous all tink yous knows wuts in store fah yous all but yous ain’t gots no fuckin clue. Faget what yous heard bout da SCRS. Faget all dat hearsay an jus sit back and experience da Second City Riot Squad in all der glory dis Sunday night at Trodown.
Jed Coffey: Yeah, boi. Shout out to all my beeshes and booshes out there repping the SCRS everywhere we go. I know we got a lot of haters out there but there’s a reason why the Second City Riot Squad is your reigning AND DEFENDING NFW Trios Champions. We done smash up Schmucks everywhere we go.
Layla Diaz: Fagive Mighty J an his sumwut diminutive grasp on da English language. Clearly, I’ma da talka a da group. Fa alls yous liddle pissants out der dat ain’t clued in on da who, da wuts an da wheres let me break it down fa yous. I’ma Layla Diaz. Dis be “Mighty J” Jed Coffey. We makes up two tirds ah da Second City Riot Squad. Now yous mus be askin youselves why we be up in dis joint. Da answa be quite simple. Mah gurl, Leah, made da call. She said der be a bunch a bishes tryin ta start sum shit an she needed sumone ta take out da trash.
Jed Coffey: That’s right. We are L’s ride or dies. She plucked us out of obscurity and offered to train us to be professional wrestlers. Well, she plucked Diaz over here out of a training school. I just kind of showed up one day and never left.
Diaz backhands Coffey on the arm.
Layla Diaz: Do yous eva shut up? LIsten up, dis weekend da SCRS be makin dey official in ring debut fa Mile High Wrestling against dose dumb bishes, da Wild Hunt. I mean, who da fuck dey tink dey is fa stickin dey nose where it don’t belong? At Mile High Spectacular tree, our gurl wuz fixin ta put dat bleach blonde floozy straight outta dis sport so we thought we just get ourselves a closer look a da action. Instead, da Wild Hunt decided ta make dey selves presence felt. Well, fuck dat. Da way we see tings, dey wuz finna get involved in da action so bein da smart individuals we is, we got dem ta chase us away.
Jed Coffey: Yeah we did. I guess all that bleach went to their heads. All we did was run backstage and duck behind a crate. They just continued to run past us like a bunch of Schmucks. We’re not just using our outer muscles but also our inner muscles like our brains. We don’t have product in our hair that seeps into our brains and makes us mindless Schmucks. Well, you do Diaz but that’s just red Kool-Aid powder. That won’t mess with your mind.
Diaz just stares a hole through Coffey with each and every word that comes out of his mouth.
Layla Diaz: All yous had ta do wuz stay outta our bizness, gals. From da look a tings, da Purge already moved on from dat false prophet Baloney Maloney but yous decided ta stick wit her.
Diaz shakes her head in disappointment.
Layla Diaz: Yous two coulda jus been left alone. Yous two coulda nonchalantly continued bout yous very existence wit out eva havin ta deal wit da SCRS. But no. Yous fucked round wit da wrong peoples an now yous finna find out da hard way. We been lookin round. We seens how MHW ain’t got no fuckin tag team division round deez parts. Tink a it dis way. Yous twos put tagetha a team in MHW and yous da champs? Who else dey even got? Da Purge? Fuck em. Da Crosses? Fuck em. Da Q Files? Dey gone already. Da Motor City Maidens? Bish please. Kate Steele an Teddy Warren? Who dey again? MHW’s tag division be fuckin weak and yous two had da choice ta sit atop dat pitiful pile a teams witout havin ta deal wit us but no. Now yous gots ta deal wit us. Now yous gots ta deal wit our wrath.
Jed Coffey: Once a Schmuck. Always a Schmuck if you ask me. I wasn’t even interested with getting those Mile High Wrestling Tag Team Titles around our waists until they stuck their noses where they didn't belong. Now, I want nothing more than to be the ones that took them straps off Wild Hunt.
Coffey looks over at Diaz, who is just staring up at him.
Jed Coffey: What did I say wrong this time?
Layla Diaz: Dat wuz da smartest ting yous said dis whole time. We didn’t come up in MHW ta be champs. We came her ta back our gurl, Leah. We came her ta build her Empire. Yous all too stupid ta realize it but da era ah da War Queen ain’t jus upon us. We in dis bish. It already begun. Now I tink we gots us some second thoughts. Maybe we come up in her and take dem tag team titles and add dem ta da War Queen Empire. Maybe, jus maybe, we make an example outta yous twos.
Jed Coffey: They kind of remind me of a knockoff of us. You’ve got one big and one little. I’m big, you’re little.
Again, Coffey can’t seem to keep his foot out of his mouth. Diaz just looks at him again. Coffey inaudibly apologizes.
Layla Diaz: Jackie Layton, da Bandit. Yous seem ta fancy yous self a tag team specialist. You held dem straps wit Ophelia Black, Samantha Hamilton an Killa Carter across four separate reigns. An I know yous finna jus boast bout da fact dat yous defended dem belts befoe against mah gurl, Leah, and won. I ain’t finna be as diplomatic as her doe. Da reason why yous all won wuz cuz her partner was bunk. Dats right. Emily Falls wuz straight whack an dat wuz Leah’s downfall. I knows she sees sumtin in Falls but I don’t gets it. But yous knows wuts yous multiple title reigns means ta me? It means A) yous can’t seem ta keep a partner all dat long an B) you lost yous titles ta Chris Mosh an Ripley? Dafuq?! Man, dat one had ta hurt, gurl. Well, we ain’t like all dose teams yous gone against before an save me wit da whole been der heard dat. Yous shit weak and you knows dis.
Jed Coffey: We know you’ve got Shieldmaidens everywhere we look. That makes you think you know what we’re all about. You think you have any sort of insight all because Gallus Mag made their way around NFW. They got a win over Diaz and L but that don’t mean much of nothing when it comes to Mile High Wrestling. You and Killer Carter have yet to step in the ring with Mighty J and the dynamic Diaz. Y’all just a bunch of Schmucks until you take us on and, even then, you’ll still be a bunch of Schmucks. What we gonna hit them with, Diaz?
Layla Diaz: It finna be straight knees an cuttahs all da way round, Mighty J. Deez ishes finna find out jus wut it means when we says we bring it straight out da south side. Yous tink yous a killa, Carter? Yous ain’t done shit and yous ain’t seen shit. We finna find out jus how killa yous is. An in da end, it finna end up straight…
Jed Coffey: Schmucks Up, Schmucks Down.
Layla Diaz: Yous welcome fa dat one, Mighty J.
Jed Coffey: That’s why I love you.
Coffey and Diaz turn back to the camera as it fades to black.
Common Room of the Shieldmaidens Clubhouse in New Orleans, Louisiana
The scene opens as we see Kara “Killer” Carter sitting alone drinking a bottle of beer, she leans back in her chair and looks up at the ceiling, letting out an elongated sigh as the door to the room she’s in opens and in walks her fellow Shieldmaiden sister and tag team partner, Jackie “Bandit” Layton.
Place’s has been a madhouse lately…
Killer looks over at Bandit, who takes a seat beside her, and the behemoth nods before taking another drink.
I hope the others find somebody to sit with Jenni, she didn’t sound so good this morning.
Killer clenches her fist as she has another drink.
She shouldn’t be going through this, Jack. Jackson should still be alive right now. But thanks to those fucking assholes I call parents, that’s no longer the case!
Bandit nods slowly.
Yeah, but it’s a reality we've all got to face here.
I know. I just want it to be over. I want those fuckers either behind bars or dead… preferably the latter. They were never my parents, and never fucking will be.
Bandit nods slowly.
I know, I get it, I do, but you need to…
The behemoth quickly cuts her off by raising her hand.
Yeah, Jack, I know! I’ve gotta control my anger!
Killer gets to her feet and finishes off her beer before grabbing another one and opening with a bottle opener attached to the chain hanging from her jeans. Turning back to Bandit, she outstretches her arms.
I thought you of all people would understand how I feel considering you’ve been through similar shit, Jack! All the other Maidens? They don’t know what it’s like having parents who don’t give a shit about them! Even Sorsh and Eef, despite the fact their father ain’t too pleased with their choice of partners, at least they still give a shit.
She shakes her head while taking a glug of beer. Bandit nods slowly.
I do, my sperm donor never cared about any of us. He pretended for the public and then decided that wasn’t worth it anymore when I was twelve. Tommie, Tammy, Ainsley, Moira, Maisie, Catrìona, they never even got to meet him. The piece of shit was more interested in where his next blowjob was coming from than any of us. Corrie and I got to meet him, but I can’t say we ever got to know the fucker. When he got sick and was on his seemingly never-ending deathbed, I felt exactly like what you just said. I wanted it to be over and every day I woke up almost hoping to finally get that phone call even though I knew what it meant and I knew how bad it would hurt poor Sheldon and my mom. That’s why I’m not saying this as Bandit, longer standing full patch in the Maidens, I’m not saying it as your tag team partner who’s been champion in a team as many times as I have as much as I have, I’m saying this as Jackie, your soon-to-be in-law…
She pauses and then smirks almost playfully.
And because Ale knows if she says, “calmate” to you one more time, you’ll never listen to her again.
This manages to get a smirk from Killer as she sits back down next to Bandit. After a moment of silence, the behemoth turns to her soon-to-be sister-in-law with a serious expression on her face.
Ale really feels that way?
I don’t blame her. I know I haven’t exactly been the funnest person to be around lately due to all of this shit that’s going on. I know that I need to control my anger better… I want to… after that whole mess that landed me in jail overnight when I headbutted that dumbass who works for my parents? I felt so guilty when I got out… not because of what I did to that scumbag… but because I could have fucked up Tori’s chance of ever seeing Rose again. I just… I don’t know how to control my anger...
I think Ale’s just worried she’s said it so much that if she keeps saying it, there’s a danger you’ll tune her out whether you mean to or not.
Maybe I should talk to her. I mean, she’s my future wife’s older sister. She’s my family… family going far beyond the Shieldmaidens. I don’t ever want her to feel like she can’t be there for me… I need to get my shit straight.
She loves you, Kara. She just doesn’t want you to end up in a bad way knowing she could have done something to prevent it. Family takes care of each other like that.
Now it’s Killer’s turn to smile as she nods.
Yeah, I know. I love her too. I had never believed in love at first sight until I saw Gabs for the first time at Twisted Steel. It was like I knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with the moment I saw her.
Bandit can’t help but smirk again.
She was the same way. She could not stop talking about you then…
The smile fades slightly.
And of course, we have to try and contain her anger at the moment as well. She wants to be fighting alongside us again so bad…
Yeah. She’s tough and she’ll get there. I’m doing my best to help lift her spirits but it’s tough. I come back from work and if I’ve been successful… I wanna share that with her and even though I know she’s happy for me, I can tell she wishes she was back in the ring too.
Bandit nods, almost laughing.
Patience has never been one of her strong suits. She’s more like Cisco that way than Ale or Gata.
No wonder we’re perfect for each other.
The behemoth then finishes off her second beer.
I should go and have a chat with Ale… and let’s say we meet back here later and deal with our opponents this Sunday?
Bandit nods, smirking playfully all over again.
Sounds like a plan, she’s downstairs watching the forlorn prospects trying to clean up after last night.
Killer gets back to her feet again and nods.
Alright thanks… catch you later, Jack…
The behemoth pats Bandit on the arm before leaving the room as the scene fades.
August 7th, 2021
Common Room of the Shieldmaidens Clubhouse in New Orleans, Louisiana
The scene re-opens as we find Bandit sitting in front of the camera and then Killer comes into the shot and takes a seat beside her, both with their MHW Tag Team titles proudly resting over their shoulders. After a moment of silence between the two, Killer turns to Bandit with a raised eyebrow.
So did you understand a fucking word those two were saying about us, Jack?
With all the accents we have?
True. But I guess I’ve been around the Shieldmaidens long enough to get used to them. But that’s besides the point…
Killer turns her attention back to the camera.
Second City Riot Squad? You have the audacity… to come into our house and run your mouth about how WE stuck our noses in YOUR business?!
The behemoth shakes her head.
Nah! See… there’s one important thing you need to know about us Shieldmaidens! And that is that we don’t need to stick our noses into our other sisters’ matches to help them win, because we’re good enough to get the fucking job done on our own! The reason why Jack and I got involved in the Main Event at Mile High Spectacular 3 is because you two stupid fucks knew that Krigare was about to shock the fucking world and dethrone the so-called “queen” so you decided to get involved yourselves!
Maybe they’re still pissed about Gallus Mag in NFW, though, you’d think those Trios Championships they won would have taken the sting out of that or…
Maybe they have a point because clearly none of their group ever goes working anywhere else or…
She trails off and then nods to herself.
Oh wait, they do that all the time, right, so is there a way they could have a point?
Killer shakes her head.
No, they don’t have a point. They’re just like every other fucking tag team or group that show up in whatever company any of us Shieldmaidens are in and they immediately pick a fight with us because they’re either jealous that wherever we go, we make a name for ourselves and end up running the place… or they’re just plain fucking stupid!
At least Leah picked people to watch her back this time that won’t cut and run at the first sign of trouble like the revolving door that was the Coven, or like what happened with Skrabz and the Toll Gang.
Killer nods as she folds her tree trunk like arms across her broad chest.
Yeah, see… I don’t understand how these people don’t seem to learn that no matter what gets thrown at us, nothing keeps us down forever. See… we’re different from every other fucking tag team and group out there! Other tag teams and groups? Eventually… they’ll split up for whatever reason and move on. But us? The Shieldmaidens? We aren’t just together at work! We’re together all the fucking time! We have a bond that goes far beyond wrestling! A bond that goes so far that we would literally die for each other! So you may be able to beat us in matches here and there… but no matter what you try and do? The only way you’re ever going to get rid of us permanently? Is by killing us!
Bandit almost laughs.
You know they’re going to claim we just gave them an idea?
She ponders this for a second and then nods.
And… technically, wouldn’t that be gimmick infringement on Solomon Grund… I mean Cain?
Killer rolls her eyes at the mention of his name.
You mean the “big bad scary” dude who got his panties all in a fucking twist just because we started using the theme song he USED to use? Jesus Christ! That’s really gonna help him look like a badass monster!
Yeah, but he used to be in a group with Leah. Can you imagine how pissed he’ll be if he finds an excuse to accuse her of stealing an idea because the SCRS attempted to promote us to full dead and he thinks it’s just us all collaborating to steal his attention whore move of being dead?
He can be as pissed off as he wants to be, I don’t fucking care. He doesn’t scare me. And neither do SCRS. Just because they’re affiliated with Leah, who also doesn’t scare me, that doesn’t mean shit to me. All I care about right now when it comes to business here in Mile High is showing this tag team division, no matter how lacking it may be… no matter how bad SCRS thinks it may be… that we, The Wild Hunt… we run this division. We are the top of the fucking food chain and we have proven that every single time we have stepped into that ring. We are undefeated… and if you two…
Killer points to the camera.
Yeah, I’m talking to you two, Coffey and Diaz! If you two really want to prove yourselves within this division? Then you’re going to need to climb down off that fucking high horse you’re on and take us fucking seriously! Because you can say all you want about how we’re so dumb because of the bleach in our hair has affected our brains like a couple of fucking pathetic high school kids! But the fact is that we are the team to beat here in Mile High and we are NOT to be underestimated!
Bandit starts to say something and then catches herself.
You know, I expected better than shit like that from you two. You're champions somewhere else. Leah is the fucking world champion here. She’s been around long enough to have seen us in multiple places and so have you. You know better than to reduce yourselves to the kind of bullshit that Chris Mosh would go with while trying to impress the actually cool kids he desperately wants to accept him into their clique so he’s not just the miserable excuse of a failure that he truly has been while pissing away whatever talent he once had by not bothering to actually try! You two, that’s beneath you and you should be fucking ashamed you lowered yourselves to that! Do better!
I couldn’t have said it better myself, Jack! See, this sport? It means everything to us! It means everything to our fellow Shieldmaiden sisters! So nothing pisses us off more than when people like you come into it and not only try and shit all over everything we’ve accomplished but to also treat this sport with disrespect! And that will ultimately result in your downfall come Sunday… coz we ain’t coming to play! Oh no! We’re coming to further solidify ourselves as the best tag team in Mile High Wrestling!
So let’s start a riot… because The Hunt is on!
Killer and Bandit then remove their titles from over their shoulders and clink them together before the scene fades.
Admin: There's this too. We can turn this chatroom into a par-dookie!
May 12, 2021 16:00:11 GMT -6
Admin: I'll be getting off of Twitter soon, and fully committing to EFedder within the next few days. If you haven't joined EFedder yet, you should. 💪💯💯 It's the greatest thing created for efedding in a long time.
May 13, 2021 15:05:01 GMT -6
Admin: Note that the deadlines have changed. I made the change for the convenience of the other judges.
May 17, 2021 15:21:30 GMT -6
Admin: Hope everyone is enjoying their 4th of July weekend/week/day! 💪💯💯
Jul 4, 2021 14:22:58 GMT -6
Admin: Where do yall hist photos? I'm thinking about switching sites, because I'm paying a monthly subscription for Photobucket and they got watermarks back on my images. I'm guessing it's a glitch or something, but it's already been two days.
Aug 7, 2021 6:56:18 GMT -6
The Purge: I use Imgur - and I've never paid a cent for their services, and no water marks
Aug 7, 2021 8:48:13 GMT -6
Deleted: o.o Lord, Rob! Get away from Photobucket ASAP! I’m with Haircin — use Imgur. It’s way better and costs nothing.
Aug 8, 2021 16:28:35 GMT -6
Admin: I appreciate yall! ✊💯💯 Ima look into it this week. Apologies to everyone if some of the images for the show tonight have that Photobucket watermark. I didn't have the time today obviously to make any switches. But I will make time this week. 💯💯
Aug 8, 2021 17:43:04 GMT -6
Admin: Katrina will probably be happy too as she was just telling me I was crazy for paying monthly for a photo host. Lol.
Aug 8, 2021 17:44:00 GMT -6
Admin: ***NOTE*** I moved the deadline up 12 hours to give the judges an extra day to read over the rps.
Aug 10, 2021 15:29:37 GMT -6
Admin: Started messing with Imgur today and confirmed to myself that Imgur was the original photo host I was using for Season One and the beginning of Season Two of MHW. Something made me mad and thats when I switched to Photobucket. I don't remember what though.
Aug 12, 2021 16:08:47 GMT -6
Admin: Ima still switch back to it though, because the Photobucker watermarks are still showing up on some images.
Aug 12, 2021 16:09:19 GMT -6
Admin: ***Just A Reminder*** The new deadline is less than 24 hours away. 💪💯💯
Aug 20, 2021 9:45:58 GMT -6
cmosh: Marisol Vilaró is Spanish, she is from Spain
Sept 14, 2021 22:50:17 GMT -6
Admin: Noted 💪💯💯 So I can get Rrina to teach me how to pronounce her name.
Sept 15, 2021 15:35:32 GMT -6
cmosh: Don't worry I don't know how to pronounce it either. She is actually played by someone else, so it is sometimes hard to do RP's with them due to our work schelduce but I am alound to use the character over here
Sept 15, 2021 19:28:12 GMT -6
Admin: Trying something different with the match writing, based off of research and just to try something new. It's a hit or miss concept, so feedback would be appreciated. ThrowDown will also debut the new layout concept. AMMO will start with that new layout...
Sept 18, 2021 8:35:55 GMT -6
Admin: It happens, brudda!
Sept 19, 2021 19:49:09 GMT -6