Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2019 6:19:22 GMT -6
Stardate 06252019... or is it 09251971?Remember how the last RP ended with "to be continued"? Well this is it, the continued.
When we last left our comedic hero duo, Space Lord and the crew of the Starship Desolater had just finished a rendition of "Time Warp" that would make even Tim Curry stand up and applaude. Oh yeah, also they had just went back in time to September 25th, 1971 to go to a football game. Well, not just any football game, but one of the most important Football Games of "Thundering" Terry Marshall's life, and the history of the Marshall University program...GO HERD!
So, nothing super eventful happened, only Terry Marshall and Space Lord went to the game, I mean would you want to bring the crew of the Starship Desolater with you somewhere in public, especially in 1971? Imagine walking down the street with a giant Human-Dog and Pizza Creature, talk about Stranger Things.
Terry Marshall and Space Lord make their way back to the Starship Desolater, which is parked in the middle of the woods. As Marshall and Space Lord push through the last tree that is blocking their view they spot Major Helmet, who is frantically pacing back and forth mumbling to himself. Sports Entertainment Xpress may not be rocket scientist... well I mean Space Lord knows how to travel through space and time, and knows how to operate and repair the Starship Desolater, which is a giant rocket ship... so maybe he actually is a rocket scientist.
Anyway, back to the story. There is Major Helmet pacing back and forth, Marshall looks at Space Lord worried about what could be going on. Space Lord jumps into captain mode, no not captain crunch mode where he destroys the roof of your mouth, but captain mode as in a fearless leader type. Space Lord marches to Helmet and in a booming tone says, "Major Helmet, what is going on here? Where is the rest of the crew?".
Helmet stops pacing, and he begins to show even more signs of being nervous. "Umm...ummm... " is all Helmet manages to say. "Well, spit it out Major." Space Lord demands.
Helmet is not able to keep eye contact with Space Lord as he replies, "Sargent Spot saw a squirrel and started chasing it. As the commanding officer I ordered Privates (huh huh, privates) Bug Girl and Pizza to retrieve them, but.. but... they have been gone an hour and a half and I haven't heard back from them."
"YOU LOST MY CREW!?! THIS IS WHY KIRK REPLACED YOU AS FIRST MATE!" Space Lord yells. Trying to keep everyone calm, Terry Marshall intervenes, saying "Calm down brother, I'm sure we can find them Do you have some way of contacting them, like a communicator badge, or ya know a cell phone?".
"Cell Phones haven't been I invented yet, it's 1971 remember?" Space Lord asks in a sarcastic tone. Marshall looks at the camera Zach Morris style alla Saved By The Bell, and then looks at the giant spaceship behind him and back into the camera and shrugs his shoulders.
"Wait, Sargent Spot is wearing his tracking collar, and Private Pizza ate the last tracking device, so we should be able to track them." Helmet says with a tone of renewed confidence.
Yeah, I know, it's weird that Private Pizza ate a tracking collar, but I mean what is he supposed to eat? He certainly isn't vegan.
"Finally, a good idea from you Helmet. Retrieve me the homing device." Space Lord says. Helmet quickly scurries into the Starahip Desplator and returns with an IPad. For some reason cell phones aren't around but the IPad and the GPS tracking device are. Don't try and poke holes in time travel stories, just agree to suspend disbelief and it will be a lot more enjoyable, ok?
Space Lord looks at the tracker and says, "it shows both Pizza and Spot are in the same location, we can only hope that Bug Girl is with them. Helmet, retrieve the phasers." Major Helmet once again scurries into the Starship Desolater and Terry Marshall who looks stunned says, "phasers, Brother you really think we need weapons?"
Space Lord looks at Terry Marshall, with a dead serious look in his eye and responds, "this may be a search and rescue mission, or it could be a hostage situation... either way we need to be prepared."
Helmet comes running back with three phasers that resemble electric shavers more than they do guns. Helmet hands one to Space Lord and one to Terry Marshall and keeps the third for himself. Marshall looks at the phaser examining it, and while doing so says, "brother this has taken a crazy turn, I don't want anyone to get hurt.".
Space Lord rolls his eyes and lets out a big sigh and says in a disappointed tone, "fine, set phasers to stun.".
The three men begin their hunt for the missing crew members, and soon find themselves downtown, and not just downtown, but fraternity row. The tracking device leads them to the Pi Kappa Alpha house, the most rowdy of all the frats.
Space Lord has not looked up from the IPad, but stops on the sidewalk and points his finger and says, "the tracker says they are in there.". Space Lord raises his head to see the frat house, and outside of it a collection of drunken teens and tweens.
"Um, I feel really nervous for some reason." Helmet says, while moving to hide behind Sports Entertainment Xpress. Without taking his eyes from the house Marshall replies, "you should, these frat boys feed on the weak and nerdy.". "Weren't you in a frat?" Space Lord asks. Marshall smiles, and his serious look turns to that of one of joy as he says, "Oh yeah brother.".
Our motley crew of Space Lord, Major Helmet and Terry Marshall head inside of the frat house looking for their missing crew mates. They quickly found Sargent Spot as he is in the middle of the living room doing a keg stand. Four frat brothers are holding him up while a crowd is around him are all chanting, "chug, chug, chug". The Frat bros let Spot down, and Spot begins to stagger around. He notices his tail and says "wait, what is that?". Spot then begins to spin in a circle trying to catch his tail, which only makes him dizzier. Spot finally makes a big lung for his tail, but trips and falls in the floor, which draws a big pop from the Frat boys who are also drunk.
Space Lord rolls his eyes as Marshall begins to belly laugh, and Helmet hurries to Spot and tries to lift him off the ground. "Helmet, take the Sargent outside and wait for us, I'm off to retrieve the privates.", Space Lord says before examining the IPad again for Pizza's location. "YES SIR! CAPTAIN SIR!", Helmet announces loudly while standing at attention and saluting.
Space Lord heads up the stairs with Terry Marshall following him. "You sure those two are going to be ok, brother?", Marshall asks as they head up the stairs, and without even looking up Space Lord replies, "yeah, Helmet couldn't hit a Mamoth at ten yards, and his phaser is set to stun.". "I meant Helmet and Spot", Marshall says, to which Space Lord replies, "oh yeah, they can always teleport back to the ship.".
"Here we go, Pizza is behind this door. What is that smell?" Space Lord asks. Marshall with a big smile on his face says, "man that takes me back.".
Space Lord takes a step back from the closed door and then steps forward with a big thrust kick, which sends the bedroom door flying open. The bedroom is lit by only a blacklight, and decorated with black light posters and a big lava lamp. "White Rabbit" by Jefferson Airplane plays softly in the background. Three frat boys all dressed like stereotypical hippies sit in a circle and with them sits Private Pizza.
Space Lord stands in the doorway, and is hit in the face with a giant cloud of smoke. "REEEEEEFFFFFFEEEEEEERRRRR!!!", Space Lord screams as he steps into the room and snatches the doobie out of Pizza's hand before he can hit it. Marshall has made his way into the room and is watching it all play out.
"Man. I'm tripping" says one of the stoners outloud. "Hahaha, what is going on?", asks another stoner. Space Lord looks like an upset mother and can't believe what is going on. "Private, what are you thinking? You know this is the Devil's grass. We watched Reefer Madness together, and you know they can't lie in movies. Look at you... I... I just can't even right now.", Space Lord says before shaking his head in disbelief.
The three stoners look at each other, then at Space Lord, and then at Private Pizza. "Huh, huh, dude...he's oven BAKED pizza", one of the stoners says, and the three of them begin to laugh along with Private Pizza. Even, Terry Marshall chuckles a bit at the joke, and I hope you reading this at home got at least a little laugh out of it, but Space Lord didn't. "WHAT IS SO FUNNY!?!", Space Lords shouts, bringing an end to the laughter.
Everyone in the room grows very quite and the tension in the room grows thicker than the smoke. Terry Marshall tries to ease the tensions by saying, "Brother, it'll be ok, it's just a little Mary Jane. Let's just find Bug Girl and get out of here.". Marshall pulls the joint from Space Lords hand and ushers Space Lord out the door. Marshall stops and turns around looking at Pizza and the three stoners, and with a giant inhale Marshall sucks down half of the joint. Marshall slowly exhales slowly and then says "Brothers, this takes me back.".
Pizza begins laughing and then the three stoners begin laughing, and then Marshall starts laughing, frankly everyone is having a good time. Marshall passes the joint to Pizza and joins in the circle, but the moment is soon interrupted. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!" Space Lord screams from down the hall, totally harshing the buzz of everyone in the smoke room.
Marshall looks at Pizza, Pizza looks at Marshall, the three stoners look at them but think this is all just a crazy trip as they dropped some acid a few hours ago. "We better go check that out" Pizza says. "Just like the man to kill your buzz" Marshall replies in a surfer guy voice for some reason. Marshall and Pizza head out of the room and down the hall to find Space Lord with his hands on his hips and shaking his head in disappointment as Bug Girl is in her underwear, but pulling her uniform back on.
"Ehhh" Terry Marshall says in a Hank Hill style voice. "Whose got five bucks, because I'm hot and ready?" Private Pizza follows up with. Pizzas comments causes Space Lord to do a Psycho Sid head snap, as his heads spins around with a look of death at Pizza. "Uh, I'll wait outside", Pizza says sulking out of the room.
At the feet of Bug Girl are four young college men all in nothing but boxer shorts, all of whom have fallen under the trance of Bug Girls pheromones. The four men crawl at her feet and when one reaches for her leg Space Lord kicks his hand away. "Look at what you have done Bug Girl...UNACCEPTABLE!" Space Lord screams as he grabs the now dressed Bug Girl and tosses her over his shoulder, carrying her out of the room.
Marshall, still in the room and still holding the joint, looks at the four young men and says "you guys got lucky, female praying mantises have a habit of killing and eating their partners during sex, which sucks for the male...." Marshall pauses and then takes another hit of the joint and looks at it and says "man, this stuff has me remember entomology".
That brings an end to our trip to 1971. The crew makes it back to the Starship Desolater, receiving a stern talking to the whole way from Space Lord. After making it back to the Starship Desolater they return to 2019, but something strange happens when they do.
The Starship Desolater blast through space and normally leaves no trail behind, but this time a strange glowing light is left. At first it is small, and then the smell of Slim Jim's becomes very strong and the neon light begins to grow and grow until it is blinding.
But then we snap back to 2019 and leave you with a cliffhanger and a good reason to read the next RP.
Stardate: 07272019"Brother, I've never done this before. Honestly, I don't even know if I can." Terry Marshall says to Space Lord. The two men are standing in the middle of the ring in the empty Magness arena. "It's no different than hitting a man, or Martian, or Volkan, and much easier than hitting a Klingon." Space Lord replies. Marshall stares at him blankly, wondering how he got himself into a team with this mad man from outer space.
"Brother, I was raised that a man never hits a woman. I thought I could do it in the name of the sport and equality, but I just don't know if I can", Marshall says. Space Lord rolls his eye and says, "but you knocked Finn Whelan out with one punch". Marahall shakes his head in surprised disbelief and says, "Brother, Finn Whelan is a guy.". "HUH, could have fooled me", Space Lord says shrugging his shoulders.
Space Lord continues saying, "Terry you are too nice, it's your biggest fault. You've got to get mean, and channel your inner pimp hand.". Terry Marshall shakes his head and asks "brother, where did you even learn that at?". Space Lord replies in a nonchalant tone, "Pimps up, Hoes down. I always watch documentaries about planets I'm on to learn about their culture.".
Marshall face palms. "Brother, I think it's monologue time" Marshall says. Space Lord smiles and begins to get giddy, and says "oh, I've been waiting for this.".
Monologue:The lights on the arena come down and an instrumental version of "Space Lord" by Monster Magnet begins to play softly. The crew of the Starship Desolater sit ringside eating their popcorn with a look of anticipation like that Michael Jackson gif.
Terry Marshall: Sports Entertainment Xpressimania and all the Marshall Maniacs, Mile High may have left us off of the pay per view, but they are making it up to everyone by having us main event the first ever episode of Ammo. What a fitting name, because Brothers and Sisters Space Lord and I are coming out guns blazing. We have been climbing to the top of the tag team division and now we are starring straight down the barrel at one half of the Mile High tag team champions and one of her riding buddies. This is our SHOT to prove that we are the rightful number one contenders, and brother when we shoot at you we hit like a fifty cal. Don't think we will leave it at one shot, oh no, if I've learned anything from my kids playing Call of Duty, it is that you always double tap your target. Sports Entertainment Xpress isn't just going to pick up the win with a quick roll up, which would be a flesh wound shot... brother we are going to make Bandit feel the Big Bang, and Pyscho will be Thunder Struck, blowing your heads clean off.Space Lord: Sheildmadions are insane if they think they can beat us. They are clowns for taking us lightly. They run together in a group to try and gain strength in numbers. For these reasons, I shall call you the Insane Clown Posse. Bandit J, Pyscho 2 Juggs, Ammo will be a carnival of carnage for you, as you learn we are the ring masters. See, if you can solve our riddle box as you find out we are greater than Milenko. BANG, POW, BOOM! You silly clowns do not understand what is coming for you on Sunday night, because it is.... OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!Terry Marshall: Space Lord ain't kidding dudes. We are out of this world, and we have been accused of being out of our minds as well... and those people might be right. We might just be out of our minds, we might be a little crazy. WE ARE CRAZY! CRAZY ABOUT OUR FANS, CRAZY ABOUT THE RED, WHITE, AND BLUE, AND CRAZY ABOUT BECOMING THE MILE HIGH TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!So, yeah we are a little crazy, and come Sunday night at the first ever Mile High Ammo everyone will see just how crazy we can get in that ring when we run wild all over the Sheildmadions. We are going to rock them from pillar to post, up and down the coast, and show them we are the team with the most.Space Lord: Pyscho 2 Juggs you may have knocked out an Earth giant, but I have conquered the giants who live above the bean stalks. I will not be taken down by a kick, I will come at you like a WAR MACHINE! WE KNOW YOU CANNOT STOP THE WAR MACHINE!A collective "oooohhh" comes from the crew of the Starship Desolater at ring side. Marshall shakes his head and leans into Space Lord, saying to him "Brother, that is too far. Besides, we don't want to blend too much OOC stuff into this monologue and get called asinine again.". Marshall and Space Lord both stare into the camera and give a big fourth wall breaking wink.Space Lord: The Maidens I now call the Insane Clown Posse think we are a joke. They like to laugh at us, but how will you laugh when I ram my shoulder into your tiny waist and knock the air out of your lungs as you experience... THE BIG BANG!!!You Insane Clowns, roll with a Posse, your Juggahoes, but we have a crew of our own, Pizza, Bug Girl, Spot, Helmet, and Jams T. Kirk. Do not fear, we are honorable warriors and the crew of the Starship Desolater are honorable as well, so you do not have to fear interference. The only thing you do have to fear is fear itself... and THE BIG BANG!!!"BANG! BANG! BANG!" The crew of the Starship Desolater begin to chant at ringside, except for Kirk who rolls his eyes and wonders why he ever signed in for this. Then again, it's not like they are filming a Miss Congeniality 3 anytime soon.Terry Marshall: A lot of people think that we are just here for the party, that we are all just fun and games, but we are more than just fun and games. We are the real deal and we are going to prove it Sunday night at Ammo. Bandit is one half of the tag teams champions and that is what Space Lord and I are after, those Mile High tag team titles. We know we are the best tag team not just in Mile High, not just in America, but in the whole world.Space Lord places his hand on Terry Marshall's chest cutting him off. Space Lord shakes his head side to side and says, "No Terry Marshall, the best in the entire Universe". Marshal starts shaking his head in aggreance as Space Lord moves his hand away.Terry Marshall: That's right brother, the best tag team in the entire Universe, and we are going to prove that by becoming the Mile High tag team Champions. First we have to go through Bandit and Pyscho, and while I'm not comfortable delivering a knockout right to a woman, I won't have a problem making sure you are Thunder Struck.
Space Lord: I never meant to cause you any sorrow. I never meant to cause you any pain. I only wanted to one time to see you knocked out. I only wanted to see you,
laungish in the big bang. Big Bang, Big Bang, Big Bang, Big Bang, Big Bang, Big Bang.I only wanted to see you, getting knocked out by the big bang. I never wanted to be your mortal enemy. I only wanted to be some kind of title shot. Insane Clown Posse, I could never steal you from the Maidens. It's such a shame your title reign has to end with a BIG BANG!Terry Marshall scratches the bandana covering his head, and says quietly to himself, "that kind of sounded like Prince".Space Lord: Bandit J, why are you called a bandit? Have you ever robbed a stage coach in old western times? You do not even wear a bandana, but soon Terry Marshall bandanas will be available in the Mile High shopzone, so you can start wearing one. Just remember though...BANDANAS ARE MEANT TO COVER UP BALDNESS, NOT FACES!Terry Marshall: Brother, that better not be a crack on my hairline.Space Lord: NO, TER-RY MAR-SHALL...what is cracked is our opponents when we trample them like torrential flood of mutated termites.Terry Marshall: Decaf, dude. Maybe only take the preworkout before we actually lift. You are right though, we are going to crack Bandit and Pyscho wide open, or should I call them the S.T. as they are now calling themselves? Well, Sisters the only S.T. I care about is the ST Strong products my brother Mark Bell cranks out over at www.markbellslingshot.com and that totally isn't a free plug, because he hooked us up with free merchandise, dude."But we just got a shipment of knee and elbow sleeves from them three days ago" Helmet says from his front row seat. Marshall turns around and shuses him like he is a mean librarian.Terry Marshall: You know brothers, Sports Entertainment Xpress is more than just the life of the party, and we are here for more than just a good time. We are legit bad dudes, who are jacked and tan and in the ring we fight like Superman. We like to party, but like to train, take our vitimins, and know darn right we hit our knees every night and thank the good Lord above for all our blessings. We like to have fun, but we are as real as real can be. We will show S.T.,we will show Bandit, we will show Samantha Hamilton, we will show the Maidens, and we will show the entire tag team division that we are the real deal and that we are the NEXT... MILE HIGH TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!Space Lord: When it's time to party we will party hard. We workout all night, and when you work you don't feel all right. And we, when things stop feeling all right, and everything is all right. Cause we will never listen to your criticisms. We will never do what others do. Do what we want and we get the tag team title from you. Do what we like and we like what we do. WHICH IS WIN!!!Terry Marshall: You say that hell is empty and the Maidens are here. Well, that is just fine because we are going to send you straight back to hell. When you go though, you'll be leaving those Mile High tag team titles behind, and they will be in their new home, which is around the waist of the Sports Entertainment Xpress.Space Lord: CHAKA KHAN!!!~Fin
|
|
Psycho
MHW Superstar
Posts: 32
|
Post by Psycho on Jul 27, 2019 18:25:10 GMT -6
Off-Camera
Saturday, July 27, 2019
Warehouse Gym
Shieldmaidens Clubhouse
New Orleans, Louisiana
7:01 PM CDT
Opportunities can present themselves in mysterious ways sometimes. Seeing them when others didn’t was what certain members of the Shieldmaidens were actually on the payroll of Venom Ink and Twisted Steel for. Jackie “Bandit” Layton and her personal assistant, Aoife “Banshee” Maguire spent their days going through leads for potential investments found by all of the other members of the Shieldmaidens and the Chrome Dragons. With seventeen patched members for the Maidens in the NOLA Charter alone, when you added the eight patches from other charters, plus multiple prospects and fourteen active patched Chrome Dragons, that could add up to a lot of leads to check on in a very short amount of time.
While it was Bandit’s job to go through the individual leads, it fell to Banshee to organize them for her so that Bandit didn’t have to waste time categorizing each by whether they were time sensitive or by who delivered the lead.
After spending several hours looking through a few to inspect the next week, the two women head downstairs and over to the gym to find Banshee’s older sister, Bandit’s tag team partner and their fellow ST member, “Psycho” Saoirse Maguire. They know the odds were good she would be there since, given her recent moods, she would likely want to be hitting something and the gym was the best place to find targets that did not carry jail time. They walk through the door and see Psycho getting ready to assault the heavy bag.
Aoife "Banshee" Maguire: Aye, she bae gettin’ ready fer Terry Marshall an’ Space Lord then...
Bandit smirks at the sight. It was just as Banshee had predicted.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Well, least we know they won’t go certain places on us…
As Banshee starts to nod, Psycho runs her hand along the heavy bag, looking ready to punch where she had just been staring at.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: If ye bae sayin’ so…
Both Bandit and Banshee turn to face the mohawked Irish woman and watch as Psycho starts to punch the bag as hard as she can.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Sorsh?
Psycho doesn’t even bother to look back as she keeps peppering the bag with punches.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: It bae nuttin’...
Bandit cocks her head.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Doesn’t look or sound like nothing. If you have something to say, now is the time.
As Psycho sets to smash the bag, Banshee folds her arms across her chest.
Aoife "Banshee" Maguire: It bae th’ name ting, innit?
Bandit frowns.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Name thing?
Banshee nods quickly in response.
Aoife "Banshee" Maguire: Aye…
Before Banshee can elaborate, Psycho starts doing so herself.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: I dinna bae carin’ ‘bout th’ Insane Clown Posse ting. Tha was almost funny, though, it bae stupid tha ye bae havin’ tae explain yer name again…
Bandit shrugs while Banshee looks on.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Some people weren’t around to hear it.
Psycho shakes her head before pointing angrily at Bandit.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Tha nay bae it, an’ ye bae knowin’ it!
She moves her accusing finger from pointing at Bandit to the camera.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: They just dinna bae bothered tae actually go look up tha information. They bae busy pretendin’ tha we bae laughin’ at them when th’ truth is, we dinna even tink ‘bout them until the match was announced an’ we had tae question whut was goin’ on at first…
Bandit’s eyes narrow.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Are you...?
She pauses and turns to face Banshee.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Is she…
Banshee doesn’t answer fast enough and Bandit turns back to Psycho.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: What is actually going on here?
Psycho’s head droops as she stands before the bag, hands at her sides.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Why bae this us?
She pauses and shrugs, her arms going out wide.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Why is this nay ye an’ Sam?
Bandit shrugs.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Because Sam’s busy in the Hardcore Title match….
Psycho shakes her head.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: She’s nay busy, tha bae a different show entirely! This look like it bae a bone tae tide us over fer nay havin’ us on the pay-per-view an’ I have a fuckin’ bone tae pick on tha!
Bandit and Banshee both just stare at her while Psycho turns and punches the heavy bag.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Why bae Gabriel Ohio in tha match with Sam, Kaito an’ Mosh? Ye kinna tell me tha bae right after I fuckin’ knocked him out! Ye kinna tell me tha it bae right tha he got a match an’ tha opportunity an’ I didna get tae even sniff it!
Bandit raises her hands to try and calm her friend even though Psycho is not even looking at her to see it.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Sorsh…
Psycho wheels on her friends, pointing angrily at herself.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: I bae th’ one whot went out an’ made sumtin’ o’ meself after this comp’ny died! I went tae GWW an’ I won th’ fuckin’ hardcore championship in a match wit eight utters inside a giant cage! Tha was me, after gettin’ one…
She pauses and punches the bag again without turning back to face it.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Count it, ONE!
She raises her fist, gritting her teeth in anger.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: One fuckin’ match haer in a fuckin’ month’s time. Tha bae when Mile High was weekly shows an’ I got ONE match! Then I got ONE match in WWO baefore it died an’ I go an’ I dinna let me career go wit ‘em, did I?
She shakes her head firmly.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: So tell me, how is it tha I did tha, I knocked Gabriel Ohio out cold an’ nay only does he bae gettin’ a match at the pay-per-view tha carry a chance at hardcore championship tha I dinna get, but th’ fuckin’ comp’ny kinna even spell me name right?!!!?
Bandit continues to try and calm her friend.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Sorsh…
Psycho turns and starts pounding away on the bag.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: So, instead o’ gettin’ an opportunity like tha, I’m a fuckin’ back-up fer a tag taem match wit two guys tha also kinna get me name right!
She stops, almost shaking with rage.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: My name isnay Piss-co… like I’m a fuckin’ bottle o’ baer or worse, comin’ from Americans! Th’ comp’ny dinna care enough tae get me name right an’ neither did they! I wasna laughin’ baefore an’ I damn sure wasna laughin’ after!
She raises her fists and starts hammering away on the bag.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Now, I jess baw wantin tae knock th’ paint off tha clem chancer!
Bandit nods to her partner and then glances at Banshee.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Selfie?
Banshee nods sadly.
Aoife "Banshee" Maguire: Bae a good idea, Lass. Sorsh isna ready tae bae nice…
Bandit nods and sighs heavily.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Alright, let’s find me a spot while Sorsh is beating that poor bag senseless. Maybe we’ll get lucky ad i can do this one quick…
The two step aside, Banshee scanning the area as Psycho continues to pound away on the heavy bag.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: I’ll fuckin’ show ye! I’ll fuckin’ show ye all!!!
On-Camera
Saturday, July 27, 2019
Warehouse Gym
Shieldmaidens Clubhouse
New Orleans, Louisiana
8:01 PM CDT
The camera opens on Shieldmaiden full patch and Mile High Tag Team Champion Jackie “Bandit” Layton only it is clear from the tight-in quality of the shot that this is cell phone camera instead of the usual professional grade equipment usually used for filming. Bandit glances of camera for a second and then looks back to the camera.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Yeah, so, this was gonna be the two of us, possible four or five of us to explain what ST is and maybe even have a little fun. It’s kind of what me, Sorsh, Eef, Bex and Knox do…
She pauses,a slight smirk coming to her face as she shrugs playfully.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Ok, so, Knox still gets hazed a little bit so the fun we have is often at her expense but it’s not like we’re making her do stupid shit like work out in ungodly temperatures until she apsses out or drink ungodly amopunts of fluids until she eitehr pukes it back up or passes out. This is not Animal House…
Pausing again, she glances over in the same direction off camera.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: And that would have been fun for the first episode of Mile High’s new Ammo show and given us an opportunity to show we can be fun too but…
She grits her teeth before looking back to the camera, the pitter pat of taped fists hitting a heavy bag heard in the distance.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Psycho just wasn’t in the mood. See, she’s still sort of trying to recover from this incident that happened before she went pro and…
Bandit nods as she looks over off camera again.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Well, she’s a little…
Bandit flinches at the sound of an impact on the bag.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Irked…
She flinches again.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Upset…
And again.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Perturbed…
She shakes her head and looks back to the camera.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: People seem to be having a sudden difficult time with her name for some reason. Her sister-in-law just had a booker call her “Mac Guire” for no reason after getting the name right for a good five years and then this week, the Ammo card messed up a couple of things, one of them being poor Sorsh’s name…
She glances over and then nods to the camera.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: And then S.E.X. both fucked it up themselves and, well….
Bandit just shakes her head.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: That poor heavy bag is…
She grits her teeth, closes her eyes and flinches huge as a loud crash can be heard in the distance.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Oh… shit…
Bandit backs up, the camera going dark for a second.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: wait, this is not a good idea…
The camera popes back up to find “Psycho” Saoirse Maguire glaring into it.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: We bae comin’ tae Denver an’ we will make sure o’ one ting! When this match is over, when Ammo has finished th’ first show o’ its kind, ye WILL get me name right!
She pulls the camera in even tighter.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: D’ye bae haerin’ me, Lads?
The lest the camera move back away from her face even as she glares angrily.
"Psycho" Saoirse Maguire: Ye WILL get me name right! Ye an’ eryone else! I willna bae an afterthought ennymore! My name is Psycho Saoirse Maguire an’ if it bae th’ last ting I do, this fuckin’ comp’ny will at least give me tha!
The camera swings around wildly and finally stops upside down on Bandit.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Sorsh?
She glances down at the phone and shakes her head.
Jackie "Bandit" Layton: Shit….
|
|
